Jenn has been mentoring again.
One of the most important messages that I am learning from her is Expect MORE. She said that her mission president's last words to her were Never Lower your Expectations. Rebecca Harper gave me an article from BYU this year that encouraged all the students to step it up. Set high goals, do not underestimate ourselves.
Always set the highest expectation for your group and family because they will rise to meet them--wherever they are.
As Mothers we are encouraged by society to treat teens one way, as weak. They are to be pandered, placated, and encouraged but protected. Just STop IT - Uchdorf.
I still remember the words of a profound mentor of great worth, he was at the time the LDS/BSA representative: Brother Poole. He said, "Mothers, stop pandering your sons. That is the greatest gift you will give them."
I had forgotten my favorite phrase for my young children when they had a problem. "Fred, Fred, Use Your Head." They use it on me now.All of the great stories we read about chidren being successful weren't pandered by their parents. Jacque Lusseyran (the blind 17 yr. old who led the youth in the French resistance) in his biography, "And There Was Light." and also the book about the blind guy and his dog in the twin towers. Thunder Dog: The True Story of a Blind Man, His Dog and Triumph at the Twin Towers--(the blind man whose mother let him bike ride alone.)
The one instance that I am reminded of in the scriptures that comes to mind is when Christ's mother is searching for him, worried about him, concerned that he is not where he should be, and yet he is where he should be! He was fulfilling his mission. Don't worry about me Mom, I'm about my Father's Work. So many times I feel the need to intercede--"Just Stop IT"--Uchdorf. That is not the purpose or the plan. It is to raise strong, effective adults who can do whatever the Lord has planned for them, no matter how difficult. You Can Do Hard Things--Hales, May, 2012.
I'm reminded of the Army of Helman's mothers. Perhaps what the mothers had taught the sons--that with God all things are possible. "They knew it to be true." They had been given the chance to prove it themselves as they were faced with life challenges and allowed to discover it themselves. They had been taught and they KNEW.
So the goal is to stop rescuing my children. Carol Dweck says in her book, "Mindset," that to change to a growth mindset, that each day we should look out and say, "Thanks for that challenging moment, for it made me grow." All these aids help us when we mentor--whatever example the Lord has called on us to perform. I hope these thoughts help inspire you.
